I observe people, watch their movements,body language and even expressions.
One woman is clearly uncomfortable around a man, her body stiffens. Noticing her “gaze” is elsewhere. He stands a good 6 or so feet away from her, Does she know him? Instincts are telling me “NO.”
My curiosity peaked as attempting to sneak looks in their direction. Taking in the attractive, features of him.
I see her making a hasty retreat as her beautiful auburn blond streaked ringlets of hair bounce with health and vitality.
Meanwhile I fumbled my cell phone right out of my hand and it slips to the floor with a loud “crack.” Shit! That’s a bit traumatic, iPhones are not cheap.
“Hi” A voice says. Picking up my cellphone, I inspect it relieved for it has no signs of damage. Looking up to put a voice to the face I am surprised, for it’s that same guy who just minutes ago was staring at the other young lady with beautiful hair.
Tall, wow. started from the feet and worked my way up to a beautiful smile then hazel eyes flecked with green and gold, “Dread” engulfs me as his eyes looked dead and “fixed.”
My purse strap slides off my shoulder as I shift my weight.
“Hi” I quickly say an walk away,all the while feeling his “eyes” perforating holes in the back of my head. A bit of panic seizes me. “He is not OKAY, something is OFF.” I say to myself.
For the rest of those 30 minutes in that store, I became highly aware of my surroundings. Children’s screams and cries, mothers shuffling away with a expression of fatigue and an imaginary white flag gripped tightly around their hands. The overhead speaker crackled with announcements, making me feel as if I was on an imaginary stage with all eye’s focused on me.
An elderly woman dressed in polka dot capris and a bright pink shirt stands there with a face of befuddlement.
Looking at me she asks where the “detergent aisle” is located. I sensed she didn’t know where she was, PERIOD. Her confusion made a word appear before me: “Dementia.”
She is walking away from her grocery cart and purse , quickly I make her aware as a Lonely purse is a temptation for the dishonest.
A young woman dressed in a happy color of sunny yellow and a worried look, relaxes as she glances in our direction.
” Abuelita! (grandma) there you are!” and promptly scolds her for leaving her side.
The lights are too bright here, body on fire, need to get out as I make a mad dash for all the necessities. At the check out lane, the cashier’s boredom and apathy is clearly evident, mumbling her way through the transaction process barely fazes me, her “energy” was so dull in comparison to all the other humans in here.
Slipping the bags in each Hand while proceeding to the closest exit, I lock eye’s with the same man, nausea overwhelms me as I shuffle out like an arthritic 80 year old ignoring him.
The surprising “crackling” of thunder almost met by a scream warns me it is Too much “energy.” Within seconds (Or so it seems) large rain drops hit the asphalt, splashing, breaking creating a “fog” like climate. People start surrounding me like cattle ready to be led somewhere, waiting for the rain to die down. A boy about 3 with large brown eyes and a chubby face with chocolate tugs my lips into a smile.
And like a horrible horror movie (I think “Ground Hog”, with an evil element) “HE” appears out of nowhere,that’s it.
Not only is the crowd enlarging but this guy makes me feel “ill at ease.”
Making a hasty retreat through the crowd I go Into some military type “mode” grabbing car keys, checking to make sure all is secure and pin pointing my car and the path to get there.
Swiftly taking off my glasses I step out into the showers that sustain life.
The next few minutes are amazing as the water pours down my face and soaking my medical scrubs, the warmth of it feels magically surreal. “Peace” wraps me like a warm blanket.
Quickened steps slow wishing it would stop time, the smell of it overwhelms the senses. I guarantee that If the lightening did not streak across the sky like a menacing bully, I would have stood there until it ceased.
One friend said it best “Rain is purifying.”
It certainly is…..